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Daddy Tames the Ferocious Junior Boys

by Janette Blackwell

Throughout World War II my Daddy had 4F draft status -- meaning he couldn’t be drafted -- as there would have been no one to farm his Montana land if he were gone.

His draft status bothered Daddy. He was young and vigorous, and he longed to fight the enemies of his country. He knew he was working hard for his country out there in the fields, but his life lacked drama. And perhaps he longed for military action more fervently on days when things weren’t going well on the farm.

Daddy and other 4F Bitterroot Valley farmers liked to talk about the war. They talked about it in the barbershop, of course, and after church on Sunday. What MacArthur and Patton ought to do to the enemy. What the army, and the navy, and the marines ought to do to the enemy. Their male hormones buzzed around rapidly, doing what male hormones do.

The men’s ferocity was only exceeded by that of the little boys, who thought nothing of wiping out an enemy air squadron on their way to Sunday school.

The junior boys of our Sunday school were especially ferocious. In fact these nine to twelve year olds were incorrigible, by the standards of the time and place. They whispered and giggled, nudged and pushed each other. They never studied their Sunday school lessons. And they openly chewed gum in church.

Several stalwart men of the Corvallis Community Church had tried and failed to whip these incorrigibles into shape. The junior boys were taught in the church auditorium, only a few feet from the adult men's and women’s classes. And whenever the teacher of the junior boys lost control of those boys, the whole auditorium heard it.

Then even worse things began to happen. At the end of our class sessions, when we good little primary children filed out of our classroom and into the auditorium for closing exercises, we were faced with a terrible sight: the junior boys had completely run amok. They were making V-shaped paper airplanes from their Sunday school handouts. Large white missiles flew everywhere in the auditorium, above the heads of the men’s and women’s Bible classes.

Occasionally a boy scored a direct hit on the pulpit and even, once or twice, on the Sunday school superintendent as he stood behind the pulpit. And it appeared, from the expressions on faces in the men’s Bible class, that they were focusing more on memories of their own boyhood than on the good Christian example of the Sunday school superintendent, who pretended nothing had hit him.

The worst of it was, of course, the example it set us little ones: pure minded children who had not known, up to that moment, that one could do anything with a Sunday school handout besides read it. Formerly innocent primary boys were seen examining paper airplanes to see how they were made. It was easy to imagine the effect these illegal missiles were having on their sensitive childish minds, the subtle seeds of corruption thus being sown.

Strong measures were needed, and the church leadership turned to Daddy to whip the junior boys into shape.

They probably felt that in Daddy they had found a disciplinary tiger. But unfortunately Daddy was not a person who enjoyed whipping other people into shape, not even little people. Of course he couldn’t say so. He was a church board member, after all, and the kind of young man the junior boys should look up to.

The European trenches may have looked especially inviting that week.

Daddy had rough going for awhile, and then, behold, he didn't.

I remember coming into the auditorium after my own Sunday school class, to find Daddy's junior boys following his every word. They didn't want the class session to end. Daddy's hand appeared to be a U.S. airplane moving steadily on its just mission. His other hand, he said, was "See, this Zero comes up and tries to shoot down the B-29, and the P-38, see, it comes in there with its guns blazing. . . ."

He and the junior boys had arrived at an understanding. If they paid attention to the Sunday school lesson and behaved themselves, there'd be time to discuss airplanes -- real airplanes -- at the end of the session. If the boys cut up and he had to spend time making them behave, the whole class period would be spent struggling with Jonah and the whale.

Their choice.

About The Author

Find Janette Blackwell’s Christian mystery and hilarious cookbook, “Steamin’ Down the Tracks with Viola Hockenberry,” at foodandfiction.com.
Janette@foodandfiction.com




Do's and Don'ts of Military Care Packages for Soldiers

by Sarah Smiley

Sending a care package to your loved one deployed overseas seems so easy, doesn't it? You just box up some cookies, attach a sweet card, and it's ready to go, right?

If only it were that easy.

Sending mail to ships/units overseas is tricky for many reasons (slow processing, mail limitations, etc.) but one of the most confounding is this: unless you've been deployed yourself, it's hard to know exactly what a Soldier or Sailor might want.

After two deployments (and a picky husband), here's what I've learned about military care packages.

Try Not to Embarrass:

You might think sending a life-size portrait of your toy poodle dressed in a ballet skirt is hilarious, but chances are your husband won't be laughing when he has to carry the cumb Do's and Don'ts of Military Care Packages for Soldiers Recipe

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Better Photos with your Digital Camera

by Kelly Paal

Everyone has a digital camera today and we all take a lot of photos. But if your photos still have trees coming out of your father’s head, mom has red eye, and your beloved pet is never facing the camera then here are some tips to help you take better photos.

1. Always be aware of the background. I know this is the hard one but it is critical. If you’re setting up a shot take a quick look at what is behind the people in your shot. So many perfectly good photos are ruined by a tree seeming to grow out of a person’s head. It can be as simple as the person taking one full step to the right or left to move the obstacle that would ruin your photo.

2. Use available light. If your digital camera has an option to turn the flash off and it’s light enough Better Photos with your Digital Camera Recipe

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Demystifying Gift Cards

by Bonnie Jo Davis

Buying a greeting card for the woman in your life can be a daunting task. I have seen more than one man with that deer in the headlights look on his face heading to the greeting card racks. Being the dominant creature that he is, he summons his strength and moves with cat-like prowess... only to find himself thumbing through card after card, toying with one card, then on and on through the others. It is not a pretty sight, this cat-and-mouse hunt for the perfect expression.

Any man can master the fine art of greeting card selection if he's willing to follow a bit of female advice.

1. Know the occasion. If it's her birthday, buy a birthday card. She won't appreciate a one-size-fits-all-occasions card on her anniversary either. All greeting c Demystifying Gift Cards Recipe

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They Loved Us

by Janette Blackwell

Our parents called them "the Bible Club girls," even though Hazel Simonton and Jean Clark had strands of grey sprinkled through their dark hair by the late 1940s. That's how people referred to women, especially single women, back then.

Every Wednesday after school, the Bible Club girls came to our church in the Bitterroot Valley of Montana. The pastor had built a fire in the cast-iron furnace in the back corner of the church, but the building was still bitter cold when we arrived at three-thirty. We perched on the first two rows of cold wooden pews, little kids with rubber boots, winter coats leaking dirty mittens, stocking caps, and, frequently, cold sores and runny noses, which noses, if they were wiped at all, were wiped on the dirty mit They Loved Us Recipe

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